i can't bring myself to get out of these sweat pants and this shirt that i wore two days ago.

there's this boy. i used to know him back when the moonlight reflected perfection off the water between the cape and nantucket, when the clouds flaked into snow on my shoulders and i smiled into the air. one day he got married, one day i graduated from college, one day he got divorced. oh, what am i telling you for? you remember.

seven years ago we were children, determined to be free of our teenage lives, swore he'd find me when he turned 18. he did, and then life followed, but as far as he went and as big as this country is, he couldn't ever get away.

now we're sitting on these computers again, grown and free and unable to tear ourselves away from trading music with each other and talking about things like matt damon and orange juice and dave matthews covers.

let me tell you what, life is unbelievable and wholly unleashable.

boston isn't ruined for me, anyway. and i'm hoping the same goes for you someday... cause dios mio do i miss kentucky. i have no claim, but this time of year it calls to me. i look for fall photos and my heart jumps when i read a book set there.

listen to johnny, he knows what my heart wants to say:

i'm not sure that i really ever could
hold on to a hotel key in your bedroom neighborhood,
and be sleep-walking in hollywood...
i'm gonna steer clear,
i'd burn up in your atmosphere
i'm gonna steer clear,
cause i'd die if i saw you,
i'd die if i didn't see you there...